Saturday, December 31, 2005

Good Bye 2005.....Hello 2006 !!

Only this much of working hours are left in this Year...



But these many are still left in NEXT year 2006....




Wishing one and all a wonderful weekend and a very very Happy and Prosperous New Year!!!

I HATE BOYS VS. I HATE GIRL...

BOYS:

A heart is not a playing thing,
A heart is not a toy,
but if you want it broken,
Just give it to a boy.

Boys,they like to play with things
To see what makes them run,
But when it comes to kissing,
They do it just for fun.

Boys never give their hearts away
They play us girls for fools,
They wait until we give our hearts
And then they play it c ool.
You will wonder where he is at night,
You will wonder if he is true,
One moment you will be happy,
One moment you will be blue.
If you get the chance to see him
Your heart begins to dance,
Your life revolves around him,
There's nothing like r o m a n c e.
And then it starts to happen,
You worry day and night,
You see my friend, you're losing him
It never turns out right.

Boys are great though immature,
The $price$ you $pay$ is $high$,
He may seem sweet and gorgeous,
But remember he is just a guy.
Don't fall in love with just a boy
That's takes a lot of nerve.
You see my friend,you need a man
To get what you deserve.
So when you think that you're in love,
Be careful if you can
Before you give your heart away
Make sure that he's a man.

GIRLS:

There are many good things in life,
Like cars,$money$,and weed.
But if you want something c o n f u s i n g,
A girl is all you need.

A girl doesn't say what she wants,
But you're somehow supposed to know,
If they want to do this or do that,
Stay here,stay there,or just go.
Then there's the time,you all know what I mean,
That monthly little j o y,
That lets them a b u s e the shit out of you,
just for being a boy.
If you ever dare to look at another girl,
They seem to scream,go on,and panic.
But watch how fast they ignore you,
at the sight of that queer from "Titanic".
They give you questions like,
"Am I fat?",
And "If you could go with one of my friends,who?",
There is no answer, face the facts,
You are definitely through.
They take nothing and blow it up,
And make a tremendous fuss,
So girls no matter what you think,
You are just as hard to u n d e r s t a n d.

Thursday, December 29, 2005

MANAGEMENT TECHNIQUE ...

Once PVNR (PV Narasimha Rao), Advani and Laloo Prasad Yadav were going inan auto. They met with an accident and all three of them died.

YamaDharmaRaj was waiting for this moment.
He asks PVNR and Advani to go toHEAVEN. But, for Laloo, Yama had already decided that he should be sent toHELL.

Laloo is not at all happy with this decision. He asks Yama as to why this discrimination is being made. All three of them served public. Similarly, took bribes, misused public post etc. He felt that there shouldbe a formal test or a concrete way to decide this, and should not be justbased on opinion.

Yama agrees to this and asks all three of them to appearfor English test.

PVNR is asked to spell "INDIA" and he does it correctly. Advani is asked to spell "ENGLAND" and he too passes.
It is Laloo's turnand he is asked to spell "CZECHOSLOVAKIA". Laloo protests that he doesn'tknow English. It is not fair that he is given a tough question and thusforced to fail.

Yama agrees to conduct a written test in Hindi to giveanother chance assuming that Laloo should at least feel that Hindi isideal).

PVNR is asked to write "KUTTA BOLA BHOW BHOW". He writes it easilyand passes. Advani is asked to write "BILLY BOLI MYAUN MYAUN". He toopasses.
Laloo is asked to write "BANDAR BOLA GURRRRRR....." Tough one.Fails.

Laloo is not happy. Being a history student, he preferred only to betested in History.

Yama says this is the last chance and he would not takeany more tests.
PVNR is asked: "When did India get Independence?". Hereplied "1947" and passed. Advani is asked "How many people died in it?".He gets nervous. Yama asked him to choose from 100,000 or 200,000 or300,000 (clue). Advani catches it and says 200,000 and passes.

It's Laloo'sturn now. Yama asks him to give the Name and Address of each of the 200,000who died.

LALOO accepts defeat and agrees to go to HELL.

MORAL : IF YOUR BOSS IS DETERMINED TO FIRE YOU, ANTICIPATE IT AND BEPREPARED TO ACCEPT IT. THERE IS NO ESCAPE. (MANAGEMENT TECHNIQUE )

Some Nice Quotes...

Somewhere, some1 dreams of ur smile & finds urpresence in life so worthwhile. So when ur lonely,remember its true that some1, somewhere, is thinkingof u.

God in heaven... god above, plz protect the 1 i luvsent with a smile and sealed with a kiss... i luv the1 who's readin this...

When love is deep in the heart, there are no regrets.When it is time for us to part, there will be tears toshed, and memories to share.

A sMiLe tO pUt You On HiGh... A KisS To Set YoUr SouLALriGhT... WouLd iT bE aLriGhT iF I spEnT ToNiTe BeiNgLovED bY YoU???

Kiss's R blown & kiss's R wasted but kiss's R notkiss's unless they R tasted but kiss's spread germs &germs R hated so kiss me babe im VACCINATED!!

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and Itogether.

Do you believe in LOVE at first sight or do I have towalk by again? ? ? ?

I asked God 4 a Flower he gave me a garden, I asked 4a tree he gave a forest, I asked 4 a river he gave mean Ocean, I asked 4 an ANGEL he gave me YOU

It is better to lose my pride to the one I love thanto lose the one I love because of pride.

if i walk inFront of u,i'm pRotecting u. If i walkBside u, i'm tHERe fOr u. If i walk bEHind u, i'mWatching over u. If i walk alone, i'm THINKING oFYou...

A heart truly in love never loses hope but alwaysbelieve in the promises of love, No matter how longthe time and how far the distance.

A special smile, a special face, a special sum1 ican't replace, i luv u i always will, u ve filled aspace no one can fill!

I miss u wen u r far away, I think about u every nite& day, Even if we cant b 2gether, I will miss u now &forever!

True luv is hard 2 find, Special 1, 1 of a kind, Butthe luv inside of me is true, It appeared the day imet you!

If dreams werent dreams & dreams came true, i wudnt bhere id b wiv u, Distance is 1 thing dat keeps usapart, But u will always remain in my heart!

If i were a tear in ur eye, i wud roll down onto urlips, But if u were a tear in my eye, i wud never cryas i wud be afraid 2 lose u!

It takes 2 to tango, 2 to kiss, 2 to talk & remenisce,so many good things cum in 2, & one of those things isme & u!

A genie granted me 3 wishes. i said i won't b havin 3wishes not even 2. i told him i wud only wish 4 1thing.. baby! i wished 4u!

when 2 hearts r meant for each other, no distance isso far, no time is so long and no other love can breakthem apart...

You might not need me now, not tomorrow, maybe notever. But even for just an instance you feel alone,remember that during that moment, I am just here.

Fate brought the both of us together. So naturallywhen you look at us, you will think we match eachother. Coz we are make to be for each other.

U must b tired cOz u have been runninG thru my mind,u gotta be a thief coz u have stolen my heart n i musthave been a bad shooter Coz i keep missing u...

So many questions, but the answers are so few, all ireally know, is, I MISS YOU

Hearts could only love for a while, feets could onlywalk for some miles, clothes won't 4ever be in style,but having U as my 'lover' is 4ever worthwhile....

U may be out of my sight, but not out of my heart. Umay be out of my reach, but not out of my mind. I maymean nothing to u, but u'll always be special to me.

True luv is eternal... Cherish da luv when U've gotthe chance, for once it leaves U, it would b difficult2 get it back.. Don't let luv be only a memory in U..

When a door of happiness closes. Another opens. Butso often at times we look so long at da closed door..that we do not see the 1 which has been opening at us

My EyEs DETECTED, My HeArT REACTED, ThOuSaNdS wErEREJECTED, AnD YoU wErE SELECTED.

They say I need treasure maps to find treasure, but Iproved them wrong coz even without a map I found U!And U'll always be treasued in my heart!

da leaves may 4get da tree, da waves may 4get dasea, da flowers may 4get da bee, or even U may 4getme, BUT I will NEVER EVER 4get U coz U R very special2 me!

The Past May Hav Been A Disaster, The Present SeemsBlur & The Future May Be Unclear. But No matter Wat MyDear, I'll B There 4U. Something That Is Always Clear

Never take 4 granted every person close 2 ur heart,coz U might wake up one day and realize that U've losta Diamond coz U were too busy in colecting stones.

tERe arE 12 monThs iN a yEaR... 4 weEks In aMontH... 7 daYs In a wEeK... 24 hRs In a dAy... buTtErE's onLy OnE YOU iN a lifeTiMe...

Love is to think about someone else more times in aday than you think about yourself.

plz remind me 2 remind u abt reminding me 2 send uthis reminder tht reminds me of reminding u tht I MTHERE 4 U.DON'T FORGET.

I hope u like them ... and will you somewhere for someone...

Amish.

ALWAYS USE LEFT EAR FOR MOBILE PHONES...

ALWAYS USE LEFT EAR FOR MOBILE PHONES
?
?
?
As received Save your brain

Please use left ear while using cell (mobile), because if you use the right one it will affect brain directly. This is a true fact from Apollo medical team.

Share this message with all your friends & family ....

Amish.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

How to Kill a Lion ... !!!

How to Kill a Lion:

TCS method:
hire a liongive him hell a lot of work and pay him government salarylion dies of hunger and frustration

Infy method:
hire a lion and ask him to meow like a cat ..he will die eventually of frustration...

IBM's metbod:
hire a lion, give him a pink slip in an hour ...he dies of unemployment...

Syntel Method:
Hire a Cat ...assure him that he will eventually become a Lion once he reaches onsiteand make sure that he never reaches onsite.Cat dies in hope of becoming a Lion....

MBT method:
hire the lion, make him take 14 tests and tell him that if he doesn't score > 60% he will lose the job.lion dies of the strain?

i-Flex method:
hire a lion???.oops cow, tell him he is a lion, send him in Africansafarifor implementing flexcube in god forbidden territories, tell him if hecomes alive he will get band movement (promotion)holy cow dies in fear of the real lion

COSL Method:
hire a lion ..tell him to merge with Goats (polaris) and reduce his allowance...lion dies from fear that tommorrow he might become a goat....

Polaris Method :
hire ..sorry....purchase a lion(COSL) ...change his timings...(instead of 9 AM ...change it to 8:30 AM )cut down his allowance (coupons etc)lion dies from fear of becoming CAT.....

Silverline Method:
hire a lion, declare a scandal and dont pay him...he dies of hunger...

Quinnox method:
hire the lion. either give him no work or ask for a premature delivery.Lion either dies of boredom or intense physical & mental activity...

Patni method:
hire a lion, offer him a salary of a cat...the lion dies before joining....
Nucsoft method:hire a lion, give him job of grass eating (IBBS Support)..the lion dies from lack of eating meat...

Satyam method:
hire a lion, give him net access..no work..and deport him to Chennai centre...no water..no electricity..no hindi speaking ppl...lion dies in oblivion......

Wipro method:
hire a lion...give him lots of work...transfer him to Wipro Lights division..lion dies due to Lightness...

Mastek method:
hire a lion...ask him to align himself with anything and everything...ask him to fill complicated competency forms... differ increments and pay him salary of a cat...lion dies due to fear of getting mis-aligned or starvation...

Caritor Method:
hire a lion...ask him to stay at work..give him vegetables to eat...hire 10 more lionsgive them vegetables to eathire 20 more.......

Hexaware Method:
hire the lionsend him to recidential traininggive him 45 days of soft skill dosewhen he comes back... give again training(dont assign him any project)one more training...more traininghe will automatically die........

Microsoft Method: Hire a lion.....(thats it...)

Have U Seen NASA??

Have U Seen NASA?? Is tat Nasa Or A dreamLand ..??? :P






Computer Shayari...

Computer Shayari ... I hope you will like ... sorry if you already have read ... :)
------------------------------------------------------------
Abhi abhi to pyaar ka PC kiya hai chaaloo
Apne dil ke hard disk pe aur kitane files daaloo

Apne chehare se ruswaai ka error to hatao
Ai jaaneman apne dil ka password to batao

Woh to hum hai jo aap ki chahat dil main rakhate hai
Warna aap jaise softwares to bazaar main hazaaro milte hai

Roz raat aap mere sapne main aate ho
Mere pyar ka mouse banake ungaliyon pe nachate ho

Tere pyar ka email mere dil ko lubhataa hai
Par bicch main tere baap ka virus aa jataa hai

Aur karvaaoge humse kitnaa intejaar
Hamaare dil ke site par kabhi to visit maro yaar

Apne insult ka badlaa dekho kaise loonga
Jaaneman tere baap ko shift delete kar doonga

Aapke ke nakhare apne dil pe bang ho gaye
Do PC joodte joodte hang ho gaye

Aap jaiso ke liye dil ko cut kiya karte hai
Warna baaki cases main to copy paste kiya karte hai

Tumse mila me kal to, mere dil me hua ek SOUND,
Lakin ajj tum mili to kahati ho : UR FILE IS NOT FOUND!

Ho gayi galati humse, Click ho gaya Mouse,
Duniya ki parwah chhodo, ban jao mari SPOUSE .
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Here are some Useful tips For You... ;)

Other ways to use your Cell phones... :D








Amish Gilani - About me

Let me introuduce myself before i start blogging... here i go...

About Me:
I am Amish Gilani. Currently I am working with AOL LLC as Sr. Analyst (SEO)

My Contact Detail:

Email:


Cell Number: +91 9880184100

My Objective:

To be member of winning team where “Innovation is meaning of life", motive is "Progress Through Learning" and "There is always a better way of doing things" is the common belief.

My Work Experience:

  • Worked as a SEO at “Brain Stream” (BSindia.com). From November 2003 to June 2005.July 2005 to till today date
  • Working with "Genessee Tech" as an SEO Specialist. From August 2005 to Till today's date.

Certification:

  • Adwords Qualified Professional Google - Google
  • Dual Diploma in Multimedia (DDM) - Institute: ARENA MULTIMEDIA
  • Professional Certification in Web Engineering - Institute: ARENA MULTIMEDIA

These is my personal blog...

Hope you enjoy reading my blog... :Cheers:

------
Amish Gilani...